The Thai Pirate - Thai Blog and Travel Stories

Flying back to UK

Off back home today, I have a duty to save the English pub industry from the credit crisis, and only 3 weeks to do it.

Thanks to everyone who reads this blog, to date I've posted 94 blogs (this is the 95th), written roughly 38,000 words and had 8000 page views. I've also (at one stage) been 23rd on Google under the search term 'Thai Blog' (watch your ass Thai-Blogs.com) so all in all, not a bad start to this blogging lark, which I confess I really enjoy.

So, have a bloody good Christmas, whether you're in Thailand, UK or anywhere else, kop kun kub, kop kun ma kub, mai ben alai, saw wad de kub, how wadee you, chok dee, soo wai mai, lovely to see you, thanks and best of luck.
The Thai Pirate.

pic above - scene from the Thai bible, located in Am Phawa Palace in Bangkok. Scene depicts Jow Gor, who was born with a bumpy shell on his head. He was constantly teased, and people thought him ugly. In shame, he banishes himself to the jungle. However, the story goes, if he can make a certain beautiful girl fall in love with him, he can break from the shell. She eventually does fall in love with him, and thus he cracks out of the shell and reveals that he is in fact a very handsome Thai laddie. He then leaves the jungle, to become a timeless and very popular figure in the Thai bible.

Places to visit in Thailand 7 - Patong Beach, Phuket

Well, we finally made it to Phuket (Poo-ket if you want to pronounce it as the Thai's do, and not 'Fuu-Ket' as la de da English peeps do).

Patong Beach has a reputation as being one of the more 'night lifey' spots on Phuket, and it was certainly bustling when we arrived. We ended up staying in a great hotel that I highly recommend (the Patong Beach Hotel). Well worth a look, fab hotel, lovely pool and fantastic grub, and for what you get it's not expensive. It's also 100 yards from Patong Beach itself, situated a little off the main beach front promenade, right in the thick of things.

So here we are, Phuket, and I'm going to be completely honest, it exceeded my expectations. The first thing, it was C-L-E-A-N, very clean, pretty god damn spotless in fact.

The hordes of Euro people and Americans who travel here have high expectations, and the people of Phuket obviously seek to meet them. The roads were clean, the beaches were clean (and dog free), as someone who has poked around Koh Samet, Koh Chiang, Pattaya etc, I had my own ideas of what I might find, but Pattaya etc aren't in the same league, they're not in the same galaxy, to be frank.

Only Krabi can match it in terms of natural beauty. And the thing with Phuket is, it's vast, the islands and coastline are not something you can cover in one, or even two holidays, there is just too much of it. And it's all stunning.

We were lucky once again, beginning of November, not that many people around. I will post later on about an Island trip that the 5 of us went on (Coral Island), I'm not kidding, we were the only ones on the whole Island bar the locals, and we had the whole beach (and sea) to ourselves.

Back to Patong, the beaches are busier than the Islands, but great for people watching. Just up the beach from us, two groups of guys (left) decided to play each other at football, one team were American I believe, and looked like they had spent far, far too long in the gym (some of them could barely run they were so inflexibly muscle bound), the other lot were Brazilian, much slighter in build and far more agile. The Brazilians ran rings around them, very entertaining. In fact, all along Patong Beach similar contests were taking place, even some official ones, and not just football, girls volleyball as well (you don't need TV in Phuket, trust me). Throw in the odd Para glider and you have your afternoons entertainment sorted.

One thing that is very annoying though, and potentially extremely dangerous is that Patong drives on the right. Yes, that's right, the whole of Thailand drives on the left, but around Patong, it changes to the right? If nobody mentions this, then like us, you could be on a sudden collision course with the locals. I don't know why it is like this, but as we had been driving for hours, we quickly blamed it on 'the bloody Europeans' who must have had the system changed because 'they can't drive on the left'. Although I reckon we are probably wrong. The traffic system is also largely one way, so miss your turning and you end up doing rotations.

Also, interestingly, but quite grim, there are constant reminders of the 2006 Tsunami. Large blue signs tell you where to head in the event of another one occurring, and various night stalls (owned by people who were there in 2006) allow you to peruse some of the most startling, and unsettling, pictures you will ever see.

Back to plus's, the beach 'pests' are, by and large, far less intrusive here. Unlike Pattaya, where they line the beaches and almost take them over in many areas, the tourism authority of Phuket obviously have them well trained, I don't think they are even allowed to speak to you, which may sound a little harsh stroke authoritarian, but you will soon get over it (t-shirt in the pic says it all).

There is also tons to do, lots of pubs, themed and un-themed restaurants, shows, clubs and shopping, the place really transforms in the evening, and is just as spectacular when 'lit up'.

I have lots of places to recommend individually in later posts, but it's safe to say, if you are planning a trip to Phuket, Patong Beach could be for you.

Thai Road Jokers - Inventiveness, and a note on 'road rage'

There is no end to Thai innovation when it comes to road travel.

I counted 20, yes 20, people aboard this self built bus. The bottom 'floor' was 4 rows of people deep! Not only that, it must have been doing over 70mph at some points.

These guys didn't seem bothered, despite being on a one way trip to rebirth if they had to stop suddenly. The driver wasn't bothered, nor the 'captain' (above, front). Captain actually looks like he is savouring the possibility of being catapulted head first into the back of a Thai truck!

This was coming back from Kanchanaburi, the triple lane carriageways are a racing man's paradise, especially for those that have been 'kept down' by UK speed camera's and sensible driving laws for years, of which Thailand has, er, NONE! (well, practically none).

It can be a rush, belting down these roads, overtaking huge lorries and self made buses with Thai's hanging off them, whilst a 4x4 tries to weld itself to your rear bumper.

Admittedly, I've lost my temper once or twice whilst at the wheel, especially when Thai drivers try to undertake you, or when they drive so close up your arse you couldn't get a fag paper between you.

Yes I have been guilty of losing my temper, and the plot, swearing and gesturing as you both risk each others lives at high speed. Most of the time on such occasions the anger is immediately replaced with guilt as your Thai 'combatant' sails past or cuts in front of you, completely oblivious to your anger and totally confused as to why you might be upset.

Thai's just don't see anything wrong with driving close, or in 'cutting you up', or by doing 30mph in the outside lane. Road rage doesn't seem to be a part of their driving etiquette AT ALL. It's not in their nature.

They just want to get to where they are going. If they cut you up, undertake, pull out in front, well, it's nothing personal. Whoops, sorry!

On the whole, I think the Thai's make very good drivers (they are certainly very good at avoiding collisions with each other!).

It's a dog's life (but not in Thailand)

These are the new 'killers' that guard the TEE Coffee Shop in Sri Prachan. Evil little feckers they are.

Mare picked them up because Leung, the previous guard dog / resident hound has gone MIA.

He arrived at the Coffee Shop around the same time I arrived in Thailand (about 6 months ago) and I am very fond of the little yellow critter. 2 weeks ago he decided to go walkabout, and hasn't been seen since.

We all hope that his previous owners came and found him, as it was strange that he had been neutered, so obviously somebody cared about him before he turned up at our place. That can happen. A few of the guys had a good look around the roads to see if he had been on the wrong end of a speeding Thai truck, but no dead Leung as far as we know.

He turned up at our place out of the blue, so maybe he has got a better offer?

These new additions to our mutt family were abandoned and doomed to have very short lives until Mare picked them up. They still live in constant peril from other dogs who might come across them and of course the traffic. I do what I can, as do others who work at the shop, but work priorities take precedence in Thailand. Dogs have to get streetwise very quickly.

A general rule of thumb is the older they get the tougher they become, giving them a better chance for a longer life, but dogs don't generally have long lives in Thailand.

Places to visit in Thailand 6 - The Mosque Market, Ao Nang, Krabi

Second night we stayed in Krabi we thought we would have a little recon, so all aboard, we drove around the main roads taking in the views.

Krabi has some stunning natural beauty, many parts are mountainous roadways, with huge tumbling views of lush greenery below you one moment, then vast hills lined with trees rising up above you the next.

Often you can look left and right to find you are surrounded by large areas of classic blue coastline.

Further inland, we came across a bustling market and thought we would stop and see what all the fuss was about.

Turned out it was a Muslim market, and we parked next to a large mosque at one end. I can't be sure of it's exact location, other than to say it's on one of the main roads out of Ao Nang towards Highway 4 (you'll see the mosque).

Lots of dead and chopped up things as expected, with hunger inducing aromatic smells arising from various offerings being barbecued, colourful stalls with lots of fresh, unusual looking fruit and vegetables, and the odd clothes and shoe stalls, which are incredibly cheap.

I didn't spot any other farang on this occasion, but the place was rammed, and quite easy to lose each other in the swaying crowds (although the market is not a big one).

There was a huge fish head at one of the stalls that was so big I felt compelled to take a photo of it (I am the equivalant UK version of a Japanese tourist these days). The old man pointed out that this fish was no good, as it's eyes were very milky, or cloudy.

This apparently means the thing has been sitting around on the slab for a few days / weeks. So tip of the day, look for crystal clear eyes in your deceased fish (that's probably common knowledge but I'm an ignorant sod at the best of times).

If, like us, you arrive in Krabi and have a free night to take a drive, the Mosque market is a slightly different take on your usual Thai market, and if you like Islam influenced food then its well worth a look.

(What's that all about?)

Long Live the King and Happy Birthday, 81 years young!